


[Panwink/Omnibus] Monologue # 2 (Guanlin's POV)

by fanfictioning



Series: [리얼물] 그들의 이야기 [19]
Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-23
Updated: 2017-09-23
Packaged: 2019-01-04 11:49:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12168300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanfictioning/pseuds/fanfictioning
Summary: YOU ARE MINEThat's a fact, I don't believe it.You already are.





	[Panwink/Omnibus] Monologue # 2 (Guanlin's POV)

/

I'm a gentleman.

but, not gentle.

Manners has become my second nature, with pleasant smiles for the public appearance.

They are mistaken if they think that's all I am.

None of you know me.

Period.

 

 

/

"Guanlin-ah, dinner's ready~"

"Yeah~, hyu-ung~."

I know from exprience from living overseas, that

the outer personalities you project change, by which environment you're in.

For example, when I was in LA. I was much more relaxed and cool.

When I was at Taipei, I was very well-mannered and gentle.

When I'm in Korea, at first.

Everyday was times of confusion and learning. It was painful, I'm not gonna lie.

But from that exprience, I've learned so much. Met so many good people who've helped me along the way,

to this point of my career. With members of my team, who I respect and adore. I speak with confidence,

all those days of pain were not in vain.

I'm grateful.

 

 

/

"Hyu-ung, hyu-ung."

The youngest out of all the members, but the tallest.

As a fact, I am not cute.

Period.

The smiles from my heart, are exclusive for the members of my team.

The aegyos for the fans, are. Well, business. Not gonna lie. Idol is hard stuff. You have to smile no matter what you feel inside.

You say 'I love you guys' even if you do not feel a bit of it. But,

everybody who holds down a job knows, you cannot be all high-brows when the rent is due.

You gotta smile, if you gotta smile.

Period.

"Guanlin-ah, you busy now?"

"Ah, nah. I'm just layzing."

Sweet smiles for my hyung.

It's no business, this.

 

 

/

My inner self is much more swag and hip-hop. I'm a rapper, remember?

The music I wish to do is much more hard-core than the idol stuff I'm doing now. But, no complains.

If this is the way I could bulid my career and create fans for myself. It's a good deal.

Wannaone-period of my career will be great learning-experience and step-stone of what will come after this.

What will come... who knows.

But one thing is for sure.

The bonds I've now made with hyungs in this period of my life, will stay and grow.

Till we're all old and grey, ah... I don't want to grow old.

But, grow deep as a human being, and rap

the joys and sorrows, the aspiration and realities of life.

I'm born to be on stage, and I don't believe it.

I know it.

Period.

 

 

/

 

Filming some WannaCity--

Ah, again.

Other hyungs are getting too close to Jihooni-hyung.

Not acceptable.

Period.

I'm selfish. I know it. That is a fact.

When I'm set on something, I pursue it to fullest. Whether that's music or matters of love.

DO NOT TOUCH

...Ah, if only I could claim him. My fangs clenches deep within his body and show whom he belongs to.

Me.

"Guanlin-ah, you feeling well? You're kinda quite."

"No, hyu-ung. I'm fine. Just chillin'"

"Oke, oke."

Where was I, ah yes.

Claim him.

My claws grab him like wolf grabs rabbit by the neck, Grrrr.

Yum.

Ah,

I'm hungry.

In more ways than one.

 

 

/

I seek his gaze with my eyes, he responds.

He shall. If not,

I'll let him know-

whom he is born to be with.

Me.

 

 

/

Soft touching, constant touching, games of nudging and keeping distance.

The point is not to get too clingy, but to let the tension grow and flow.

Do not pursue like a virgin kid, but let the target desire me more than I let known. Let him seek me, more than I need him.

Do not hog like a insecure child keeps his blanket. Be yourself. Not some 7th-grader who has fallen in love for a first time.

I know all these, in my head. I've always been in control of myself, whether that be matters of love or work.

But this... is impossible to be around him, and not touch him.

 

 

/

Trust me, I'm well adored. I've just gotten hundreds of presents for my birthday. All over the world, all of them- Quite expensive stuff, none of which I'm able to buy with the money I earn now.

Such is an irony of an Idol, you are more popular than you actually should be according to your performance on stage.

I know I need to learn a lot, in a pretty short period of time.

I do know, that my dance have improved a whole lot. Since, I've been around hyungs who are so much more skillful and exprienced on the stage and outside of it.

Everytime I take stage, the past me of the last stage is shattered into pieces and am reborn, as whole new me.

My potential, Unlimited.

I don't believe it,

I do it.

Everyday.

 

 

/

"Guanlin-ah, come here and help me with somethin'"

"Oke, hyu-ung."

Ah, yes.

Attraction.

It's impossible to be with him and not touch him.

God, I've become so clingy.

Now I know I am much more softie than I thought I was. I've learned,

in the grueling days and nights at those days of that show program which I'll not mention by its name, that

You just cannot survive sane in that kind of environment, unless you are mad.

Whether mad about music or ego, food or some kind of faith. You're easily broken down, multiple times under pressure of the stage, survival and mental control.

It's natural to be broken down, it's a step to be reborn and grow.

But to grow, you need something. Not power, but

Love.

God, I've become soft. No, I've learned myself better.

To be reborn, love is the bond which will pick up those pieces of your broken past-self, and glue them together.

Without love, you are nothing but marionette.

You may be quite a functional one, but still a muppet without heart.

With love, you are fulfilled; and my love is for my music. My muse is my love, and he is...

impossible not to touch him when I'm with him.

God, I've become so clingy. But no complaints.

He is nice to hold on to.

That's a fact, and...

I qutie like it.

A lot.

I like him.

A lot.

If only he takes me seriously enough so that, he keep appropriate distance with other guys. Haven't I told you already,

DO NOT TOUCH

HE IS MINE

See?

I'm not gentle; I am gentlemen with people I work. But that's work.

In matters of my music and my love, I'm a selfish sonofabitch, and

I'm not sorry about it, I'm proud. Selfish bastard in matters of love and work.

KEEP YOUR DISTANCE

None shall come between us, I'm a wolf.

 

 

/

Wolf.

Yes, wolf, I’m a wolf, awoo

(I love you) I’m a wolf and you’re a beauty

I eat rabbit for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

At alleyways, corriders and in bed.

My smiles for other people are qualitatively different from the one for him.

Only for him, I do smile from my heart.

Yes, wolf, I’m a wolf, awoo

(I love you) I’m a wolf and you’re a beauty

Please know, for ever before and after.

YOU ARE MINE

That's a fact, I don't believe it.

You already are.

Period.

 

 /

fin

/

/ Sourced Music  
EXO - Wolf  
[ Watch! ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hw_xc0sVZ48)

/ Bonus!

EXO - Monster  
[ Watch! ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KSH-FVVtTf0)

**Author's Note:**

> ***
> 
> This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. All characters and events in this fiction--even those based on real people--are entirely fictional.
> 
>  
> 
> ***
> 
> Hello, this is Jamie.
> 
> Comment and kudos, if you like.
> 
> Thank you.


End file.
